5 Ways to Avoid Social Media Swindlers
Save Your Money and Your Sanity
The snake-oil pushers of today are putting their namesakes to shame. Masters of brain manipulation they play to our human insecurities and hook us with their emotional stories. The swindlers of yesteryear would roll up in their wagons full of miracle cures, twisting their moustaches with a beguiling grin. They would tell tall tales of travelling the country, curing more and more people along the way. They grabbed money in exchange for bottled promises and disappeared long before the realization, shame, and anger set in.
Today they show up in our social media feeds. Dressed to impress with effortless lifestyles, loving relationships, and 6-figure incomes. Armed with toxic positivity, they hook us in with their stories of struggle. Our brains are captivated and quickly attempt to reconcile the perfect image that we see and the story of hardship we hear. How can we relate so deeply to the struggle and yet not to the rainbow-filled lifestyle that is being portrayed? What are we missing out on that they have? What do they know that we don’t? Then they give us the peace we are looking for — THE answer. They tell us that we too can go from our struggle-filled grey life to their rainbow lollipop paradise, and they will let us in on the secret.
Taking advantage of people who genuinely want to make positive changes in their lives really grinds my gears. The vulnerability that it takes to not only recognize the desire for change but the humility that it takes to look outside yourself for help is something that should be treated with the utmost respect. There is a moral code that is violated when you abuse that privilege, and it happens ALL. THE. TIME.
Working within the wellbeing industry exposes me, and my social media feeds, to these people constantly. Whether it’s a detoxifying concoction, a new mindset, routine, or workout I must adopt, or a revolutionary coaching program — I have been pitched on it all. I’m also what would be called an ‘easy mark’. I bought my first snake-oil as a 12-year-old, smelly pens that would effortlessly allow you to lose weight, just sniff and POOF! (They didn’t work.)
I wish I could say that was my first and last experience with getting swindled into buying snake-oil, but it was not. Thankfully I have gotten better at shutting these down before handing over my money, and I have figured out a few ways to spot them before they can charm me.
Here are my 5 ways to spot modern-day snake-oil salespeople (SOILS):
- They can’t explain anything deeply.
I was once asked to explain how drugs and alcohol affect brain development to a group of 10-year-olds who had been busted smoking weed and drinking whiskey on school property. It was a challenge to break that complex topic down in a way that was understandable and would be meaningful to them. Just to make sure they understood what I had explained to them I had them teach it to their parents who joined us at the end of their punishment our session. To my great relief, they were able to transmit a fair amount of knowledge to their parents.
Would they be able to answer any deeper questions on neurodevelopment or addiction?
Of course not. Nor would we expect them to, they simply learned a simplified version of a complex topic that was targeted to their experience.
The biggest difference between those kids and SOILS is that the kids would own up to their lack of knowledge. They wouldn’t attempt to trick you into believing they were neuroscientists. When pushed SOILS deflect and redirect. They won’t answer your questions directly, or they will gloss over them on their way to more emotional hooks. They make claims like “You’ll just have to try it to find out”.
A true expert will have evidence-based theories that underpin their work. They will have more than just a testimonial experience as evidence. When pushed they will be able to point to research that would support their approaches and they aren’t afraid to admit what they don’t know. Perhaps most importantly an expert will generally not claim to have the answer, but rather a possible answer to a problem and should be able to point to other possible answers if theirs is not a good fit. - They overpromise and underdeliver.
You know the popular saying — “If it seems too good to be true, it probably is”?
Well… it’s true.
The problems that SOILS are offering solutions to are extremely complex. Our brain, despite being incredibly complex itself, dislikes complexity. It much prefers a simple, effective, and efficient solution — especially to problems that cause it discomfort. This makes what SOILS offer so difficult to resist. Smell this pen and lose weight, follow these three steps to find happiness. It is certainly possible to lose weight and there are actions you can take to increase your wellbeing — however, they are not simple solutions with instant results.
The reality is that short-term solutions generally lead to long-term problems. They trick us into believing that we are working towards our desired outcomes — when in reality we are focused in the wrong place. I genuinely believed that by sniffing a pen before a meal I would not only lose weight but everything would just be better. My life would somehow transform into an Instagram image of perfection. When neither happened I didn’t turn on the product, I turned on myself. The problem wasn’t the product — it had worked for other people — the problem was me. Now those silly smelly pens didn’t cause my issues, but instead of helping, they handed me another stick to beat myself up with.
Complex problems have slow and complex solutions. They DO have solutions, but they are rarely clear-cut, easy, or fast. If that is the promise being pushed on you — you might want to take a pass. - They make you think their solution is THE solution.
This may be the tactic that hooks me more than any other. It plays directly to my need for connection and my fear of missing out, and that is precisely what SOILS are hoping for.
They build up and focus on the outcome. The life you will be able to lead once they share their secret with you. More importantly, they make you believe that if you don’t join them or use their service then you will forever be on the outside looking in. They may tell you they only work with people who are really dedicated to making a change. That they carefully curate a community of people willing to take that leap. If you aren’t willing to blindly leap then you don’t make the cut.
Experts know that there is no universal solution to complex problems and that the best solutions are usually a combination effort. They will regularly refer to other services that might be a better fit or offer you different options to fit your unique situation. An expert should leave you feeling supported, regardless if you use their service/product. You should never feel pressured to make decisions on the spot. If a product or service is valuable that value will last even if you need time to think about it. - They closely guard their ‘secrets’ behind expensive paywalls.
While they may offer some sort of free offering in exchange for your email address, there is generally nothing actionable in them. The majority of free e-books are very skillfully crafted sales materials. They deeply explore the problem as they are defining it, the outcomes that their solutions offer, and how much your life will change after you buy their snake-oil. Their goal is to get you more deeply emotionally hooked while offering glimpses of the promised solutions. Once SOILS have you emotionally hooked on outcomes that you now realize you can’t exist without, they let you know exactly how much it will cost you for access to their solution. This number is usually shockingly high (I have been hit with $12,000 price-tags more often than I should), but don’t worry, if you put down a nonrefundable deposit today you’ll get a limited-time discount.
Experts are (generally) open to sharing their knowledge. Even if they do have services or products available the free resources that they have are often valuable entry-level tools. Talks, papers, or interviews are readily available with a Google search. True experts tend to not talk in terms of ‘secrets’, instead offering new perspectives and connections on collective knowledge, because of this there is no pressure to make an immediate high-pressure decision. - They mock, block, or ignore any criticisms.
As you look through the comment sections on the most influential SOILS you will rarely see a criticism. Social media isn’t normally full of glowing comments with no haters, so either the product really is the miracle that they claim, or they are blocking and deleting comments. If you dare to come forward with criticisms SOILS will blame you for product failures — you didn’t do it right, you didn’t wait long enough, it is a YOU problem. These are left up as a social deterrent as they are open to ridicule by the SOILS and their followers. Public shaming is commonplace.
Experts are generally open to (valid) criticism and open debate. Understanding that their solution is one of many possibilities they can argue why their solutions are a valid option, but they will not make it a personal attack. Developing your own theory or method requires a deep understanding of an issue, and it involves many iterations. Improvements can often come from either defending against criticism or from accepting it as true and integrating it in. If you feel as though you are being personally attacked for a valid criticism then you may be dealing with snake-oil.
SOILS are not new. They are not unique to the wellbeing industry, and it is unlikely that they will be going anywhere anytime soon. Our best defense is a critical mind and a practice of pausing before making any decisions. Particularly those that we are being pushed to hand over our money for. SOILS are skilled at hooking into our emotional brains. They take morsels of facts and meld them into something that is outwardly appealing but does not sustainably offer the solution we want or need. If we want to save our money and our sanity we need to engage our thinking brains and watch out before we get hooked.
Avoiding SOILS is one thing — but how do we find the advice, support, and tools that we need?
- Once you find them UNFOLLOW scammers and do not engage with their posts. Do some research on who you choose to follow, google any methods they suggest and add ‘criticisms’ or ‘reviews’ to the search. Look for the researchers behind the methods — do they have resources or social media to follow? Make the algorithm work for you.
- Create Community — talk to others with the same goal, ask questions, share successes and failures. Learn from each other.
- Remember — there is NO secret, not everything works for everyone but SOMETHING will work for you. If something doesn’t work then it wasn’t the right tool. Put it away and keep trying until you find what works for you. If you need some extra support a professional, coach, counsellor, or therapist can help!
Have you been swindled? Do you have ways of spotting SOILS that I didn’t mention? Let’s share stories and knowledge so none of us get swindled again!
